How to Preserve a Husband

 

Taken from the Scheuermann's Family Recipe Book

 

Be careful in your selection.  Do not choose one too young. When once selected, give your entire thought to preparation for domestic use.  Some insist on keeping themselves in a pickle, others are constantly getting themselves in hot water.  This makes them sour, hard, and sometimes bitter.  Even poor varieties may be made sweet, tender, and good by garnishing them with patience, well sweetened with love, and seasoned with kisses. Wrap them in a mantle of charity.  Keep warm with a steady fire of domestic devotion and serve with peaches and cream.  Thus prepared, they will keep for years.